So, I have a crazy goal for this coming month. All of my bills are paid (yay!) ... and there isn't much left sitting in an account waiting for me to find a job ...

So I'm giving myself a budget of $200 next month. I wonder if this is even doable? Usually, I spend $160 a month just in gas ... and that's been while I'm unemployed, we do a lot of driving back and forth to my parents.

So, I have $200 in cash for the month of March. It's kinda ... scary, to be honest. I think it's doable though, at least I hope it it. I know our fridge/freezer and pantry are pretty stocked, I know I'll have to buy somethings in the coming month, but not a lot. We have pretty much everything else I can think of.

My goal is to not use my debit card at all this month. I actually had a freeze put on my card this month from using it so many times. ACK! I was stocking up on some really good sales, so Visa thought my card was stolen. I admit, it was incredibly embarrassing to have my card declined, and knowing there was money in the account, but what can you do? I wish they would call and ask BEFORE putting a hold on your card .. but whatever.

So ... I think this month could end up being interesting. Less driving, no redbox ... and having to explain to a four year old what no means. I swear, she knows, but she doesn't want to listen.

My 25th birthday is in March ... and Twilight is coming out. I might make an exception to the $200 rule for a birthday present, however it would be far more exiciting to try to include it. If I haven't gotten a job by my birthday, I think we'll be going to the zoo. They are doing a birthday celebration this year as well, and while not as cool in our book as Disney, it's a heck out of a lot cheaper.

The only thing that could be hard is my brother will be in town for a couple of weeks ... he was just here for Christmas, but he had to have surgery on his shoulder (or has to, I think it's the 4th), so he's coming out here to rest up. He has a lot of leave available, so I can see us coming out here more to see him, which is the only reason I can see our gas being a problem.

Fingers crossed for March ... maybe I'll finally get a stinkin job!

So, I don't know how many of you have heard about the latest girl from Florida who was apparently taken from her own bed .. but I'm officially creeped out.

Even though I don't necessarily live anywhere near where Jessica Lunsford was taken from, or near where the latest victim lived ... it SERIOUSLY creeps me out.

I can't help but wonder how many other times this happens, and what it takes for it to be "high profile" enough to hear about it if you don't live near the area that it happened. When Elizabeth Smart was taken, I think part of the reason it was on National news so quickly was because of how unbelievable it is.

This is the one time I don't mind that my 4 year old spends most nights in bed with me.

I think part of the reason it's making me worry so much is because this is really the first time I've lived on my own with Juliette. I have an alarm system, but it doesn't always ease my worries. The house across the street from ours is now in foreclosure, and the house two doors down is empty as the woman tries to decide if she wants to sell her father's old home. I feel vulnerable.

This week, I'm adding an extra lock on both front and back doors. I think it's just going to be a chain lock, I haven't reall decided, but I want it up just incase my daughter decides she wants to go for a late night walk or something.

I wish I could say I knew all my neighbors. There is one guy who honestly gives me the creeps when he walks by. And well, they usually say a mother's instinct are right. I don't know what it is about this guy, but he seems "off". He also likes to play with the kids in the neighborhood, and you don't want to lable someone just because you don't think it's normal, but well, I don't think it's normal for a grown man to play with little kids. That's weird, right?

I honestly remember growing up, in the same neighborhood, and my mom had us play outside. All the time. I don't feel comfortable letting Juliette play on the front porch most days.

Yesterday and today I drove my happy butt all over town. For four interviews and two "testing" sessions. I am exhausted. LOL. Who knew looking for work was so much well, work?

Good news, I have a 2nd interview lined up for tomorrow. YAY!

Tomorrow I HAVE to get some stuff done around the house. I feel like I haven't been home all week. And, well, I haven't. The really cool news is my parents have been feeding us. And my awesome dad has been watching Juliette.

I'm ready to just sit around the house all weekend.

I have two interviews this week, and two "testing sessions" for other jobs. Fingers crossed this leads to someTHING. Anything at this point.

One of the testing sessions is to work as a 911 operator. My dad laughed at this one, not because he doesn't think it's a good idea, but because he is a retired fire fighter, and both my brother and I have expressed an interest now in doing something along those lines.

The other testing session is for a work at home oppurtunity through a hotel chain. Let's see how that goes. The pay isn't great, and it's only part time, but hey, part time is better than nothing.

Ok, so I am blunt. I can be mean, and sometimes, I just keep talking when I know I shouldn't.

My grandmother is currently staying at my parent's house. They keep pushing to hurry up and get a room ready for her to come to my house. I keep stalling ...

Today I asked her when she was leaving. Oops!

I didn't mean to pry, or to really push. I don't want to be "rude" but well, when someone is walking all over you, it's hard not to.

She made an appointment at a lawyer's office back where she lives (2 hours away!) and then asked me "Mandi, you don't mind taking me, do you?" Umm, yeah, I do, but whatever. It took 8 HOURS to go out there and come back ... seriously.

In the car, I asked when she was planning on going out to California. That's all she's talking about, going out to California. She told me as soon as she gets all of her "stuff" done. She doesn't want to divorce her husband, she wants to have a seperation. She isn't asking for money ...

Needless to say, I wasted my entire day for the lawyer to tell her she could have done everything over the phone and he can't do anything until she talks to her husband. Which, she hasn't done yet. UGH!

I guess, to be optimistic, by spending the ENTIRE FLIPPIN DAY driving her around, I managed to keep another day of freedom by not working on her room. WOOT!

Hey, at least it was a NSD!

I have a little bit of "play" money set aside. I had been needing to buy a new computer for awhile (I cracked my laptop screen almost a year ago) but I was just doing without for the moment. I kept some money aside waiting for a deal ... and I finally came across one.

I bought the new computer last night.

Today I broke my cellphone.

UGH!

Normally, I would "do without" but now I am pulling money out of my savings because I have to have a cellphone. I don't have a landline at the house, and since I am TRYING to get a job, I have to have a phone for people to call me.

UGH!

So, I'm looking at phones, and really not wanting to sign up for a contract. Man, I'm just glad I have "play" money. It won't be "play" for long if I don't get a job ... but I don't feel safe not having a phone at home at all.

Stupid me for dropping the stupid phone.

The good news is, I have two interviews next week. One is part time, the other I have never heard of the company before. So ... fingers crossed!

I'm actually tired of spending money.

After a return trip to the doctors, we finally have a diagnosis. She has a UTI, probably due to the fact that a) she's a toddler who is still learning the whole wipe business and b) she's notorious for holding her pee in.

I took her in Monday after she spiked a temp of 104.5 Sunday night. I hate when my kid is sick.

I haven't killed my grandmother yet, thank goodness ... and hopefully she'll be going to California soon. She is stating that she wants to "tour" around our family. Well, I think I am going to put my foot down and say "Sorry there is no room at the inn."

I think part of my problem with this whole idea is I've JUST gotten out of the rommate stage. I mean, I want my OWN home, with my OWN rules ... and I certainly don't need another child (sorry, my grandmother is too dependent for my taste).

I just keep putting off the idea of her coming to my house ... my poor parents are stuck with her for now.

I just honestly can't comprehend someone deciding that just because someone has the "extra" room in their house (I have a four bedroom house, the other two rooms are my office and Juliette's playroom) They aren't "extra" to me. I told my parents I was going to find two roommates and tell her "Sorry". At least the roommates would pay ... my grandmother hasn't even offered to pay money to live there.

I can't wait until I am old(er) and can just assume that I can live with my grandchildren ... and not even offer to help out with the bills. SIGH!

Yeah, I might be overreacting, but, damn it, I'm going to stick with the title.

Julie came down with a fever on Thursday night ... and still has it. It's broken twice, but not for long. It's 103, close to 104 at times, and she is refusing meds. UUUGGGGHHHH!!!!!

On the way to the doctors on Sat, she threw up ALL OVER the back seat of my car. She hadn't been throwing up, and I swear I had been transplanted into some sort of horror movie at that point. It was GROSS! My mom had to meet us up at the doctor's office because I didn't have a spare change of clothes in the car. Her doctor is in a different town, and I would have missed our appointment if I had turned back home. Tomorrow, when I go back to our house, a spare change of clothes is going into the back of my car. YUCK!

Friday, my grandmother came to stay with us. I'm not the praying sort, but I am praying with all my might that this isn't permanent. She wants to come and live with me.

NO!!!!!!

I don't want to give up what little bit of freedom we just achieved by living with my completely irrational (spoiled) and just plain weird grandmother. Seriously, not gonna happen. My dad (her son) is highly allergic to cats, ended up in the emergency room the last time he had cats in the house because he stopped breathing. She comes with her cat, and tells my dad "No, I won't let the cat stay in the garage" ... yeaaaaahh, let's just kill your son because of your cat. Are you nuts?!!?!

I really try to be "mature" ... but I'm going to be a big fat baby on this one. I do NOT want this to happen. I can handle my grandmother and her possibly soon to be ex husband on small doses. Like, once a year sort of doses. Her marriage to my "grandfather" is her fourth marriage, and she's been threatening him with divorce for years. I think that's why most of my family migrated to California, so they wouldn't be stuck with her. UGH!

So, Juliette's sicker than anything I can remember .. and I have my grandmother watching over me asking me why Juliette's being so mean. Ummm .. because she's sick!? I haven't gotten much sleep since Thursday ... and I'm just tired. My car smells like puke, and I can't even be comfortable in my own home.

Here's to hoping she goes back home ... and soon. I told my dad and mom that if they convinced her to go and live with my Aunt in California, I would pay for the plane ticket. LOL, and I'm serious!

Hopefully Juliette gets better soon, but I have a feeling I'll be back at the doctor with her soon.